There was someone in my life I couldn't accept. I didn't even notice it until I was on the Wizards Course. He seemed like less than a bug in this world. I thought I would never forgive him until my death. When this person occurred to me intuitively, I felt I needed to do a rundown about him. But I postponed it because it seemed like such a huge wall. During one of my rundowns I was reminded of him again, but refused to see the connection to the rundown I was doing.
At last I did a rundown about secrets with an Advanced Intern. I finally realized I trampled all over him and held that man, although dead, not to be able to go to the next world. I never gave him any chance to explain himself before and I always looked at him cruelly. I was cruel and heartless. After I realized this, I started to see him as a human being. But that was all I could not find any secret about him. The Advanced Intern worked with me. It took almost all day. From the viewpoint of source though, a very little thing can still be a secret. "But," I said "I upgraded him from a bug to a human being and that was enough. He deprived my Mom of me. He gave me such horrible suffering." I asked myself how could I be an attacker to such a horrible guy.....? Finally I found the secret I had. My transgression against him. I had felt my transgression was very trivial compared with his huge transgression. I didn't even think of it as my transgression. But that it was!
After finding it, I can feel the person I never imagined I could forgive, as a pure being, a being of light. The hatred was gone. And I realized I could take responsibility for all my sufferings. They are my creations. In the Bible ( I cannot remember exactly correctly) someone asked Jesus which one is worse, the one who stole one dollar or the one who killed a man. Jesus said the weight of their sins are the same. Yes! That's right. I had tried to remain as a victim. I blamed him for my suffering and avoided my responsibility.
Thank you so much Harry!
Keum Hwa Kwag- Korea