Yesterday I regained my enthusiasm!!
I have always known myself as somebody who likes to really go for things, who is enthusiastic for something. But, for the past few years I increasingly noticed that I really had to make an effort to be enthusiastic, about anything really. It was like I knew the echo of the feeling of enthusiasm, but that I could not really fully create it anymore.
Whether it was playing with my daughter, doing my work, being with people... I increasingly noticed that everything had a slight grey blanket over it which dulled the feeling. I compensated that with using my will knowing that what I was doing was important, but still - it was kind of a surrogate for the real feeling of enthusiasm!
Yesterday I did a rundown from the Wizard materials and I discovered that I had been using enthusiasm for years to overcome structural misallignment in my company, and to achieve not feeling small and socially outside when I was young. So I've been using enthusiasm to create over things I did not want to experience and now, each time I felt enthusiasm (like the enthusiasm I feel for the contributing to an EPC)... it brought up a negative feeling as well! No wonder I kept feeling ambivalent!!!
I handled these feelings, and this morning I woke up with so much space.... I am feeling me again, enthusiastic to start the day and start creating again!
Thanks Harry for these powerful tools, they truly are a miracle!
Patrick Kools- the Netherlands